Have To, or Get To

I have a nasty habit of grumbling every time I have to do some sort of chore. I have to mow the lawn. I have to do my timesheet at work. I have to do grocery shopping.

This way of thinking usually causes me some frustration when I get around to doing that chore. The phrase "have to" has this negative connotation to it, that I'm doing it against my will, forced to do it.

It's not a useful way of looking at the work. Yes, there are some things that need to get done, but saying I "have to" do it is just going to make me annoyed when I do get around to it.

A better way of phrasing this is that I "get to" do that work.

I don't "have to" mow the lawn. I get to mow the lawn; it gets me outside and reminds me that I'm fortunate enough to have both this property and the time to actually maintain it.

I don't "have to" do my timesheet. I'm lucky to have a job that keeps me financially stable. I know that filling out my timesheet is part of the agreement I have with my employer. I'm choosing to do this.

I don't "have to" go grocery shopping. I could always get my groceries delivered or order takeout for every meal, but I'm choosing to go grocery shopping. Perhaps more importantly, I'm lucky to be able to put food on the table; there are too many others who don't have that luxury. I get to decide what I eat tonight.

The tasks we choose to do are not a punishment. They are a reminder of the agency we have over our lives.